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in theWild West 

  Rosie in Seattle

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My humans, without consulting me,  took me from my home in Seattle, across the mountains, to Montana, to Yellowstone, to Wyoming and Devil's Tower, to South Dakota and the Badlands, to Wounded Knee and Deadwood and Mount Rushmore. And then home. Despite my trying to get them to take decent pictures of these places, no matter how much I barked, I was ignored. For the most part....

Somewhere in Montana, I'm not sure where, I think the name of the place was Deer Lodge and I thought I understood my humans to be saying we would be continuing on the rest of our trip in this old horse wagon. My understanding of human speech is limited at times, so I was relieved when we left this place and got back in the truck with the camper on back.

I know my humans were wanting an authentic Wild West experience, but I got tired of watching them put up our teepee each night. It was far more comfortable to stay in the camper, in my opinion.

We were in this place called Yellowstone and there was this big thing called a Buffalo. I wanted a piece of him, he made me so mad the way he ignored me no matter how much I tried to communicate  with him. My human was barely able to hold me back. I'm still a little upset about it, because I would have been all over that beast like a fly from hell. When you're a Rat Dog you have so little control over what you get to do.

But then there were some beasts I was happy my overbearing humans kept me from chasing....

As if I needed special rules to know not to chase a Grizzly Bear. Even a little Rat Dog, like me, knows you don't mess with bears. 

Isn't this the Grandest Teton you've ever seen?

For over an hour my favorite human and I sat on some grassy area near Jackson Hole, Wyoming, while I tried to teach her the Rat Dog version of the Macarena. This human has absolutely no sense of rhythm, so I finally gave up.

 

Now, see the difference?? This is my other human feeling the rhythm in the Black Hills of South Dakota and she's shaking one mean Rat Dog Macarena. This is one human who can really move her ham hocks.

My worst night of this entire trip was spent in Deadwood, South Dakota, the town where Wild Bill Hickok had his way with Calamity Jane before he got murdered by Jack McCall. My humans left me alone in the camper and went into Deadwood for a night of carousing. I don't quite understand why my humans drink poisoned water which makes them sick, but sometime, very late, that night in Deadwood, a car with a shiny red light on top showed up and pulled my favorite human out of the back seat. She could barely walk!!! With a lot of effort the humans were able to put her in bed where I spent the rest of the night guarding her.

After we left the Black Hills, Mount Rushmore, the Crazy Horse Memorial and Wind Cave behind, we went further West, towards Badlands, the National Park. Right at the entrance to Badlands, the National Park, there is this town called Wall, you see billboards for hundreds of miles telling you that you must stop in Wall. At the Drug Store. And so we did. Stop at Wall Drug Store. It was a sprawling tourist trap which I rather enjoyed being carried around in. People paid so much attention to me. I heard one person say that I was the cutest little Rat Dog they had ever seen. I think Wall Drug Store was my favorite place on our entire trip!!

Thank you for letting me tell you a little bit about my life as a Rat Dog. I'm very sorry my humans did not take better pictures of the places we saw. Can you believe it?? Not one picture of a geyser at Yellowstone, not one of the faces at Mount Rushmore, not one bad thing from the Badlands. Well, all I can say, and this probably doesn't mean anything, coming from a Rat Dog, but I think my humans should take me somewhere else. Seattle, maybe. And they should take better pictures the next time....


 

  Rosie in Seattle

Wild West
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